Gilbert Cartoon - Quotes Contest...
Received an email from my friend, Kumar. Check out the best 10 quotes in Gilbert Cartoon Quote Contest...A magazine recently ran a "Dilbert quotes" contest. They were looking forpeople to submit quotes from their real-life dilbert-type managers. Here are the top ten finalists:
1. "As of tomorrow, employees will only be able to access the building usingindividual security cards. Pictures will be taken next Wednesday andemployees will receive their cards in two weeks."(This was the winning quote from Fred Dales, Microsoft Corp. in Redmond, WA)
2. "What I need is an exact list of specific unknown problems we mightencounter."(Lykes Lines Shipping)
3. "E-mail is not to be used to pass on information or data. It should beused only for company business."(Accounting manager, Electric Boat Company)
4. "This project is so important, we can't let things that are moreimportant interfere with it."(Advertising/Marketing manager, United Parcel Service)
5. "Doing it right is no excuse for not meeting the schedule."(Plant manager, Delco Corporation)
6. "No one will believe you solved this problem in one day! We've beenworking on it for months. Now, go act busy for a few weeks and I'll let youknow when it's time to tell them."(R&D supervisor, Minnesota Mining and Manufacturing 3M Corp.)
7. Quote from the Boss: "Teamwork is a lot of people doing what I say."(Marketing executive, Citrix Corporation)
8. My sister passed away and her funeral was scheduled for Monday. When Itold my Boss, he said she died on purpose so that I would have to miss workon the busiest day of the year. He then asked if we could change her burial to Friday. He said, "That would be better for me."(Shipping executive, FTD Florists)
9. "We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not going todiscuss it with the employees."(Switching supervisor, AT&T Long Lines Division)
10. One day my Boss asked me to submit a status report to him concerning aproject I was working on. I asked him if tomorrow would be soon enough. He said, "If I wanted it tomorrow, I would have waited until tomorrow to askfor it!"(Hallmark Cards Executive)
7. Quote from the Boss: "Teamwork is a lot of people doing what I say."(Marketing executive, Citrix Corporation)
8. My sister passed away and her funeral was scheduled for Monday. When Itold my Boss, he said she died on purpose so that I would have to miss workon the busiest day of the year. He then asked if we could change her burialto Friday. He said, "That would be better for me."(Shipping executive, FTD Florists)
9. "We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not going todiscuss it with the employees."(Switching supervisor, AT&T Long Lines Division)
10. One day my Boss asked me to submit a status report to him concerning aproject I was working on. I asked him if tomorrow would be soon enough. Hesaid, "If I wanted it tomorrow, I would have waited until tomorrow to askfor it!"(Hallmark Cards Executive)
posted by syaq @ 4:32 PM
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